My final point is that Canada can stand up to America because we know you, America, better than any other nation in the world. America, the political and geographic entity, is not abstract to us. We know you, we get you, and we know you’re not as invincible as you seem.

The idea that Canada is nice and genial, and the notion that not getting a deal with us is ridiculous, satirical, because we are “the friendliest nation on the planet,” is part myth and part condascension. The myth part comes from the reality that, as American comedian Josh Johnson brilliantly described, Canadians are polite, but not nice.

That not-niceness, when it comes to America, is a reaction to the condascension. It’s something we grew up with, absorbed as a Canadian culture. Americans think they are just being nice when they visit us, and tell us not to listen to Trump and to just go ahead and keep being the country we are.

I know that’s well-meaning, and designed to be kind. But the idea that we need to be told by Americans to not listen to Trump and keep being ourselves is the type of condascension we’re used to hearing from America, the kind of older brother-kid brother relationship, where the older sibling always assumes they have the power and the upper hand.

They’re still siblings, and care for each other. But the older brother never thinks the younger brother can be wiser, more well-versed, or more seasoned on any issue. The older sibling believes, always, they are just a few steps ahead, leading the pack, and the younger brother is always trailing behind, following the same path, and learning from the older.

So as the U.S., without even realizing it, has treated Canada. As the younger, less evolved sibling. I don’t need to say it, but I will. That is not how we see ourselves. We do very well on our own. We’re different, we’ve struck out our own path, and, yes, you’re family. We’ll always love you… at least, we’ll always love you, individual Americans, not your fascist leadership… but we don’t need to be in this toxic relationship anymore. We’ll stick with Canadian Thanksgiving and won’t be coming for dinner and football in November.

When Mark Carney walked away from those trade negotiations on August 21st, he reacted as a Canadian. And that’s why the vast majority of us support him.

There’s a subtlety here, and I don’t want to get into a debate about who is a “true Canadian,” because the very notion is quite silly. But there is a difference between someone who, like Carney, has Canada in their heart and someone who has Canadian citizenship as a technicality.

Let’s turn to Mark to sort of explain that, without even being asked the direct question. Asked how his childhood might compare to Michael Ignatieff’s, Carney told The Rest is Politics in late 2023 that he, Carney, grew up in Canada while Ignatieff, the son of a diplomat, largely did not.

So Carney reacted as a Canadian on trade. But there’s something more here that answers the question of why Canada, of all countries, was the one that didn’t capitulate to a new deal with Trump when many other parts of the world did.

Let’s start with former U.S. Ambassador David Cohen’s assessment that Canada’s backbone is not new. And note here, even from a pro-Canada Democrat, the hint of condascension in his words (starting at 7:05 in the video below):

“[T]he Canadians are very tough and can be very difficult negotiators. When I hear — — and his team criticize Canada and say how hard it is to do business with them, that has the ring of truth to it. Because even a Joe Biden who absolutely loved Prime Minister Trudeau and loved Canada, even a David Cohen who fell in love with this country, there were times when it was very frustrating to be sitting across the negotiating table with Canada, which at times seemed to elevate its importance in the world order and its importance to the United States and made it very difficult to negotiate with them.”

I appreciate the sentiment in recognizing that Canadians can be tough negotiators. But let’s look at that phrase: “… elevate its importance in the world order and its importance to the United States.” I reckon that if the U.S. went ahead and pushed through and got to a deal anyway, again and again, decade after decade, Canada must have always had something the U.S. needed. If that’s that case, Canada was never really “elevating” its importance to the United States, was it? If you didn’t need to do a deal with Canada, why did you?

I think sometimes about the innkeeper in Vermont whose family business has relied on Canadian tourism for years and now is struggling. I really feel for all of those American business owners. Think about how hard it is to run any kind of a business in the best of times. Imagine having your customer base significantly depleted because of something completely beyond your control, something that has almost nothing to do with your business or your industry, and something you likely don’t even agree with.

That empathy we can have, and do have, for individual Americans and businesses is the flipside of the advantage we have in negotiating with the U.S. We know you. Our Canadian heads are filled with anecdotes about the good and bad parts of life in America. We have friends and family who have gone south for quick and expensive medical care, we’ve paid $10 for a rapid COVID test while on vacation, while back home it would have been free to grab from a box at the entrance of the local pharmacy.

We know America, like Canada, is far from a monolith. We also know it’s not the mighty, dominant world power it claims to be. Maybe it never really was. That was partly based on fact, the dominance of the U.S. dollar, and largely based on myth. But America is our older brother, and we’ve seen him grow up. We’ve decided not to follow the same path, and although it might be painful, we don’t plan on sharing the same house again anytime soon.